Let’s talk about shame. I once heard someone say, “Shame is a powerful motivator.” It is.Shame causes us to hide. An abusive partner will use shame to their advantage, causing their emotionally battered counter part to keep secrets out of fear. Shame causes fear of rejection, fear of unbelief, self doubt, & loss of self …
No Visible Bruises
There is a lot of talk about Domestic Violence. But what about, "Domestic Abuse?" There's a lot of buzz talk about "Narcissistic Abuse" but if only 3% of the population can be labeled, "NPD (narcissistic personality disorder)," where does this leave the women who've been quietly abused by their spouses for years? Who will believe …
“I’ve got you”
Open spousal communication starts with knowing your spouse has your back - the default should be that spouses have each other's best interests at heart and will give each other the benefit of the doubt. If that's not happening in your marriage, it's time for a serious conversation and maybe some help. You should not …
Trials Are Not a Contest
Never think that what you are enduring in a valley isn’t worth sharing. Burdens shared become lighter. Do not think, that just because some else’s burden looks heavier than yours, that it minimizes what you are going through. Pain isn’t a contest. It’s a chance to gain empathy for others, experience empathy from others, and …
Hold on to Yourself
Living with a toxic person, can suck the life and character right out of you until you do not recognize yourself. Are you becoming easily angered, bitter, or losing your sense of humor? Do not let anyone else’s bad behavior dictate your own! Do not give a toxic person that power.
Hold Your Own
Is someone cataloging your faults? Are they throwing every wrong they think you've committed back in your face? Do you feel like all you are is a failure? No one is all one thing. We all have and do "good and bad." Even if you believe that everything negative hurled at you is true, you …
You do you
Make the decision to not let anyone else’s bad behavior dictate your own. You will be stronger for it - and feel better about yourself. Be in control of your own choices, starting with how you react in any circumstance. Ephesians 4:31“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away …
A word of advice
When someone repeats a pattern of behavior over and over, it’s unlikely they are interested in changing. If that person dodges responsibility for that behavior - finding a way to explain how “this isn’t that” or it’s someone else’s fault, they aren’t going to change that behavior. Stop believing their repeated lies and believe their …
Not My Experience
A young lady listened to tales of her father through the eyes of his friends. She knew that they were talking about her father, but the person they were describing didn't at all look or sound like the person she experienced as her father. Their relationship to him was different than hers, so they experienced …
A New Focus
When I first started this site for my brand new Life Coaching business, I wasn’t focused. I was looking at all the ways I could help people and open to all possibilities. Recently, it’s become clear to me that I have a particular heart for helping women who are going through - or have experienced …
K. Stephen Life Coaching: Freedom in Crisis 